am i spoiling my daughter?

sometimes i ask myself this question.

i don't know if i'm giving her too much...but i know i'm not giving her too little.  we provide all of her needs and i think enough of her wants so she does not feel deprived but i wonder where do we draw the line?

you know why i'm thinking about this?  last night, michelle fell asleep at her usual bed time while i was busy packing our things for the trip...she woke up at around 9 pm and i had to bribe her to go back to sleep.  now that i'm writing that down, i probably shouldn't have bribed her.  maybe i feel guilty about that.  do you know what i bribed her with????  it's not some extravagant toy or anything like that.  it's gum.  i bribed my daughter with gum!  she had just discovered the joys of blowing bubble gum and she had ran out of the sweet, chewy goodness.  i told her last night that if she goes back to bed and does not go to mommy and daddy's room in the middle of the night, that i would buy her some gum.  she asked me for 5 little packs of gum and i said yes (we're going on vacation and i'm sure gum would be expensive on the cruise ship!).  but she didn't do her end of the deal and she still went to our room in the middle of the night.  so this morning, i told her the deal was off the table and she looked so disappointed! 

so my question is, if i buy her gum, does that mean i'm spoiling her?  if i don't buy her gum, does that make me a mean mom?

you'd think these things were easy, right?  but it's the pattern of both our behaviours that i'm trying to make sure is aligned. 

i feel like i'm making a trip to walgreens in a few minutes and indulge my daughter's request for 5 packets of gum.  i'm a wuss.  =(