new year's resolution

So 2008 was a BAD year for my waistline and overall health. So for 2009, here is my game plan:

1. Drink less coffee. I don’t drink a lot of coffee, just 1 cup a day (sometimes none), but I keep on drinking it even if I don’t really like how it tastes! I like the fact that it wakes me up when I’m starting to fall asleep at my desk, but I’ll drink tea instead of coffee beginning today! (it’s only December 31 as of this writing).

2. Pick healthier snacks. I don’t eat heavy main meals but you’ll see me munching on junk in between. I got a good scolding from my husband last night and have decided to change my ways. Not only are my snacks of choice not good for my weight (I eat chips, chips, and more chips!), they really have no nutritional value. So I’m snacking on fruit beginning today. (already had an apple earlier. Clap clap clap!)

3. Drink soda only once a week. I drink diet coke almost everyday. While I’m limited to 1 can each time, I know it’s not doing me any good.

4. Eat more malunggay! This has got to be one of my favorite vegetables in the whole wide world! I should learn to incorporate this wonderful veggie to most of the savory meals I prepare. Buti nalang it’s readily available at the local asian supermarket and my mom learned to blanch the leaves and freeze it. I can use it in place of spinach in my omelet and puree it and add to pretty much anything I cook.

5. Drink more red wine. I love wine but I’m a big white wine drinker. I should split my wine consumption fifty-fifty.

6. Work out 3 times a week. Wish me luck on this one!

it's the holiday season...

Michelle was really excited about Christmas this year. I don’t think she realized the ‘gift giving’ part of it until we actually decided to put the Christmas tree together (no real true because my desire was shot down by every single family member, except for michelle) and presents started piling up under it. Naturally, she believed every present was for her, even though more than half of it are gifts for other kids. She loved the Christmas music that continuously played on KOIT Radio. She calls all Christmas lights and decorations ‘jingle bells’. Her favorite Christmas songs are jingle bells (of course!), jingle bell rock, and feliz navidad (spanish wanna-be ang anak ko e). And this is how she sings it…

‘feliz dididad! Da da da da da! Feliz dididad!’ (I’ll try to take a video and post it here)

We decorated a gingerbread house yesterday and she managed not to eat all of the candy. We’ll try to bake cookies together soon. I didn’t want to make it from scratch so I just bought the pre-made ones that you break off and bake in the oven. I’m sure she’ll have fun getting her hands messy like she did with the gingerbread.

My uncle from seattle is here and michelle is delighted to have another lolo around. She calls him, ‘lolo lori!’ (lolo rollie) and she gets confused because all her 3 lolos look alike (lolo abet, lolo rollie and lolo cesar). My cousin and her husband (also from seattle) will be arriving tomorrow and we’ll take them around to see the spots. San kaya sila maganda ipasyal?

I want to go to target to get a BIG FAKE CHRISTMAS TREE on sale. I wonder if there will be any more left by the time I leave the office? Hmmmm (as of 6 pm..we went to target and all that's left are christmas trees that are 9 feet tall. that's too big for the house so i have no choice but to buy it before christmas next year. hindi umepek ang pagkukuripot. or i might get my real tree next year! i bought several decorations for a good price though.)

Forgot to buy two presents and will try to scour the mall for a decent ‘new year gift’. I should really stop the last minute shopping thing because either I forget, or there is nothing good to buy anymore.

Sana matapos na ang holidays para wala ng kainan!!!!!

gingerbread house

i bought a gingerbread house kit at target not too long ago. i wanted michelle to get her hands sticky as she decorates the house. this is her masterpiece.

christmas eve

michelle's christmas eve presents

how i miss...

The smell of apples remind me of Christmas and the new year. I know it sounds weird because for most Americans, apples remind them of the fall. But being the transplant that I am, this time of the year is the time when apples abound in the markets around the Philippines. There are times when I would linger at the apple section of the grocery store here in the states just to take in the smell of the apples that remind me of Christmas at home. I would leave the area with a smile and a feeling of warmth, like I was home for a few seconds.

I still remember how my dad would start playing Christmas songs as early as September 1st and how I would start asking my mom to go to the mall to start our Christmas shopping in October. My parents would have a budget for each of their three kids on how much could be spent on new clothes for Christmas. The budget for my brothers is always larger than mine, which surprisingly, didn’t bother me that much even when I became aware of how expensive their jeans and shoes were. Every year, when my dad gets his bonus, we would make a trip to RAON and buy one major electric appliance or device for the house. My favorite was one holiday season, back in the 80s when we went there to buy a Nintendo Family Computer and how excited my brothers and I were to be finally getting one. I never got into the whole family computer thing, but I was happy my parents were generous enough to buy it for us. Back then, it was an expensive gift, even for 3 kids.

Trips to raon will include lunch at WAPAC (wala na tong restaurant na to, unfortunately) and they served the best pancit canton and fried chicken I’ve ever had. My parents used to go there a lot before they were married, then at least once a year after they had all three kids. One waitress in particular knew my parents to be regular customers and one Christmas, my dad gave her tip which was almost the same as the cost of our entire meal. After she realized how much she had received, she jumped up and down, teary-eyed, hugged my parents and thanked them profusely. it wasn’t a lot of money but maybe it was enough for whatever it was that she needed. Her joy was electrifying, and I remember leaving the restaurant with a big smile on my face like i was the one on the receiving end.

I miss going to simbang gabi, even though it’s a struggle to get out of my warm bed on cold December mornings. I mostly look forward to the pancit luglog, puto bumbong and bibingka that we ate after the mass. I miss seeing the neighborhood kids dressed in their holiday best, going door to door to greet people and wait for their Aguinaldo. I miss having my cousins over at our house to eat all the food that my mom has prepared. I miss my Nanay Dhe, Nana Juling, Tata Sergio, and Lolo Pacing and the smile on their faces when they see all of their grandchildren together. All four now celebrate Christmas everyday with our Lord, and I bet they are so much happier now.

I am looking forward to bringing Michelle home for Christmas and having her experience what Christmas was like for her dad and me and I’m sure she’ll have a greater appreciation for her heritage, her tradition, and her family. And I hope later on, she’ll agree with me when I say, there is no better place in the world to celebrate Christmas than spending it in the Philippines!

to the camus family

"Earth hath no sorrow, THAT HEAVEN cannot heal."

-Thomas Moore

restaurant review: bong su

After visiting t’s dad at the hospital last night, chel and I were debating whether to get a nice dinner or just get jalopeno poppers for jack in the box. Of course, we decided on dinner and bong su was just around the corner from where we were so it was the logical choice. I have been to bong su before and I wasn’t really impressed with their food. It is fancy (a.k.a. expensive) but the food is just ok, until I had the cod.

The appetizers we had were the vegetable crepe and the crispy crab spring roll…the vegetable crepe was a blander and deconstructed version of your good old lumpiang gulay. The spring roll was forgettable, even if it had soft shell crab in it.

The highlight was the carmelized black cod which was oh so good! Now, I would come back for that!

Dessert was so, so. It’s hard for any restaurant to mess up on dessert.

But if you’re going to bong su, get the black cod. It’s easily one of the top 5 fish dishes I’ve ever had.

it's about giving

I told my husband I don’t want any gifts from him this Christmas.

There are so many things that I have already and I can’t really think of anything that I need. of course there’s so much that I want, but I can live without those. I want to rid myself of self-indulgence and materialism even if I have a feeling it will be short-lived.

I have to keep reminding myself that Christmas is not about me. it’s not my birthday so why should I get any gifts? I don’t even expect gifts on my birthday so why expect any now? Don’t get me wrong, gifts are great…it’s the giving, not the gift. But I know you’ll agree with me when I say that more than half of the gifts you will receive this year, you will never ever buy for yourself. It will end up in the closet or in the garage, gathering dust and you’ll forget all about it until it’s time to clean up all the clutter. You’ll donate the unwanted gift or re-gift to someone else, who, like you, will absolutely hate it, and a new cycle begins.

My husband and I were exchanging ims yesterday and he was asking me what he needs to get for our daughter before he comes home for the holidays. we haven't really decided on what to get her this christmas but this early in her life, we want her to realize what Christmas is NOT about.

It’s not about getting gifts.
It’s not about all the parties.
It’s not about all the candy.
It’s not about all the food.
It’s not about the twinkling lights.
It’s not about the brand new clothes.
It’s not about the crowded shopping malls.
It’s not about Santa Clause.
Not about Rudolph, nor the elves, nor the north pole.
It’s not about the candy canes, the ham, or the chestnuts roasting on an open fire…

It’s about the joyous occasion of the birth of Christ and what he has done for all of us. It is about God, giving; and we, receiving the greatest gift of all.

I want michelle to realize how fortunate and how blessed she is to have what she has. I want her to be grateful and generous. I want her to share and be happy about sharing. I told michelle yesterday as we were singing Christmas songs that Jesus’ birthday is coming up and we had this exchange…

I asked her, ‘what do you want to give Jesus on his birthday?’
‘Birthday party! Balloons…lots and lots of balloons and birthday cake!’, she replied enthusiastically. (I’m not exaggerating!)
‘That’s great sweetheart. Kantahan mo si Jesus ng ‘Happy Birthday’ ha?’, I said to her.
‘Opo,’ she said with a smile.

Of course, I don’t think she really gets the importance of this holiday, but I don’t want her to begin her christmas memories with materialism so I have to start this early by making christmas a holiday about Jesus. I want her to focus on that. I know I’m being idealistic, but the world will not teach these things to my daughter, so we have to.

I’ve also been thinking about what to give Jesus this Christmas. What does the Lord of all things want to receive on his birthday? what God wants is for us to give…and our giving must reflect God’s agenda. here are some ideas...

Proverbs 19:17 — “He who is kind to the poor lends to the LORD, and he will reward him for what he has done.”

Acts 10:2-4 — “[Cornelius] and all his family were devout and God-fearing; he gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly. One day at about three in the afternoon he had a vision. He distinctly saw an angel of God, who came to him and said, ‘Cornelius!’ Cornelius stared at him in fear. ‘What is it, Lord?’ he asked. The angel answered, ‘Your prayers and gifts to the poor have come up as a memorial offering before God ...’ ”

James 1:27 "Here are the kinds of beliefs that God our Father accepts as pure and without fault. When widows and children who have no parents are in trouble, take care of them. And keep yourselves from being polluted by the world. "

Matthew 25:34-40 — “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’ ”

Romans 12:13 — “Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”

Malachi 3:10 - "Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this," says the LORD Almighty, "and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it."

2 Corinthians 8:12 "Whatever you give is acceptable if you give it eagerly. And give according to what you have, not what you don’t have."

2 Corinthians 9:7 "You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don’t give reluctantly or in response to pressure. “For God loves a person who gives cheerfully.”

And this is my favorite… Luke 6:38 - "Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.”


My Christmas wish this year is for more and more people to fully understand what giving is all about. If you GIVE your tithes and offering to the Lord, and give with joy and gladness, you have NOTHING to fear. God has promised to open floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessings that we will have no room enough for it! Can you imagine being so blessed, you have no room to contain it!? so, give…give…give! you have nothing to lose! we can never out-give God.

love ritter sport!

i have friends who live in germany and whenever they come to the states (or whenever chel goes there), they HAVE TO bring lots and lots of ritter sport chocolates for us here. european chocolates are 10x better than american chocolates and ritter sport is one of my favorites. i especially love the one with whole pieces of hazelnuts. yum-oh!

ritter sport is gaining popularity here in the states. and not too long ago, they snapped this picture of me in the city. i am a ritter sport friend!!!

ano sya, hilo?

sabi sa balita kanina, ang pinakamataas opisyal daw sa kumpanya namin ay nahingi ng bonus na nagkakahalaga ng sampung milyong dolyar! dapat lang daw syang bigyan ng ganon kalaking pera dahil daw sa kanyang pamumuno ay 11 bilyon lang ang nalugi sa amin at naisalba ang kumpanya sa pamamagitan ng pag sanib sa BAC. bukod sa milyon milyon na nyang sinusweldo, kailangan pa raw nya ng sampung milyon. ano sya, hilo?

hindi ako sanay mag mura, pero nang nabasa ko to, parang gusto ko magmura. nagtatanggalan na sa kumpanya namin para nga ibaba ang gastos tapos hihingi sya ng ganitong kalaking halaga. nasisiraan ba sya ng bait?

at matapos maging headline ito sa buong amerika, napahiya yata naman yata sya at binawi ang hinihinging bonus para sa taon na ito. wala ngayon siyang matatanggap ni singkong bonus. kami kaya, may singkong matanggap?

isa nanaman itong halimbawa ng kasakiman ng mga tao sa wall street. sabi nga sa bibliya, "...ang pag-ibig sa salapi ang ugat sa lahat ng uri ng kasamaan". nakapagtataka pa ba kung bakit nagkakagulo ang ekonomiya ng buong mundo ngayon?

one somber moment

yesterday, it was officially approved and we are sold to bank of America. My heart is heavy as we say goodbye to the name many of us so proudly carried for the last 94 years. I’ve only been a part of this great company for the last 5 years of its colorful history but I really feel as if a part of me has died. maybe I’m being dramatic, maybe this really is for the best, but it’s hard not to feel nostalgic and emotional when something this big happens in your life. I am grateful and blessed to still be here, working for a now combined force of the most powerful financial institution in America (maybe the world), but yet there is this ache deep within me that I can’t quite shake and a longing for the better days that once were, but there is a reason for everything and a time for everything.

I pray for better days ahead for everyone who was part of this company and for those of us that are still left behind.

to all of my merrill lynch family, we are a 'herd apart'! be bullish!!!

home sweet home!

we started sleeping in our new home on monday. like all new homes, it's still cold and quiet but i'm loving all the space we have. we are not bumping into each other and michelle runs all over the place (we have no living room and dining room furniture yet). we don't have to worry about parking so running errands in the evening is not a hassle.

michelle still misses our old home. it hasn't quite registered that this is her new home. she calls the house hers, but refers to it more as 'big house' and not home. i guess she misses the warmth and all the attention she gets when we used to share a home with her ninang's family. we miss them, too, but we gotta do what we gotta do.

i went to home depot earlier to scope fresh christmas trees. it was very cold tonight and the smell of pine filled the garden area at the store. i was so tempted to buy a tree right then and there but i want michelle to pick the tree...not that she would know what to pick but i want it to be an experience for her.

i'm excited about christmas and all the traditions and memories we will have at home.